Making Myself Over
Monday, April 12, 2010 So I have to giggle as I type this - and I realize this might be a trifle of a blog entry, but that's okay - because I remember a few years back blogging about the fact that I was VOWING to try to get myself dressed like a real adult every day. That I was going to kiss my J. Crew sweats goodbye and look like a person my kids wouldn't be embarrassed to have drop them off at school each morning.
Has that happened? Erm. No. So I've given up on it. The truth is that I like to be comfortable, and this usually means, yes - gasp - putting on my workout clothes first thing in the morning until I've had time to actually workout (at some point in the afternoon), and until I've showered (which might not be closer to dinner time), at which point, I often get right into my pjs. (Wow, this might be turning into an embarrassing confessions type-of-post.) Some days, I manage an 8:30 AM workout, in which case, sure, I'll shower and tug on jeans (slouchy boyfriend jeans, but not sweats, so that's a victory), but most days, it's me and my sweats. There's just no fighting it.
But I have discovered something that makes me feel a little less slovenly, a little less like a hermit who sits in her office banging at the keyboard and whipping up ideas like a crazy person. And that - (and this might be where this post gets really flightly, sorry!) - is that I've vowed to start wearing make-up each day. No more pulling on a baseball hat for school drop-off, no more really large and dark sunglasses to make me appear much more glamourous than I really am. (Okay, those stay, but I look more presentable underneath.) Just a hint of mascara, shadow and concealer, and I swear, I am more connected to the outside world. Does that sound ridiculous? It feels ridiculous, even as I type it, but one thing that I've learned in my years working in my solitary environment is that sometimes, it takes EFFORT to sort of still be part of the big picture outside of your office door. I mean, in some ways, would it be easier to go all Campbell Scott in Singles and just completely lose it entirely while you're working on a manuscript?
But this is me fighting back. This is me raising my fists and saying, "I will not going quietly into the night!!" :) Okay, or this is just me rediscovering my vanity. Either way, a little make-up can go a long way.
So now that I've shared, won't you? What are your techniques of not losing yourself entirely to your writing life and world?
Reader Comments (20)
So glad I'm not the only one who does that... everything from not showering until evening to dropping my son off at school in my sweats and a baseball hat. Haha.
Now that the weather is nicer, I've vowed to take daily walks through the neighborhood. I've also decided to clean/organize one area of my house every day (other than the daily regulars, i.e. washing dishes, picking up toys, etc). Today: my son's closet. Time to make the official switch from winter wardrobe to spring. :)
Well at least you've put on your workout clothes. I have been known to stay in pjs all day!
Now that the weather is so nice, I plan on waking up and going for a morning walk, then returning to shower, change (into really comfortable clothes) and combing my hair.
And allowing some time to clean around me.
Putting on a little makeup? Yes. That sounds like a good idea.
I guess the trick is to realize that writing can be part of one's life, not ALL of it.
Reading this I was struck, hard, by the fact that there are so so many posts on writing sites about exactly the opposite thing: how to get into one's writing life. There are tips, there are takes, there are descriptions of habit and ritual and place, there are discussions of how to disengage. And so on.
What is happening to us in our sweats inside the writing box?
This post, about not losing oneself to one's writing life, is really different, so different from anything I have read that I need to think about it for a while.
I have to admit, I get dressed every day (even weekends), but that's mostly because growing up my dad never let me stay in PJs past about 9:30 a.m. Cruel & unusual, no? Also, I don't think my day job would appreciate me showing up in jammies or sweats. :P
That said, I like getting dressed for the day. It's more comfortable to me than jammies. So I think I'm still fulfilling your principle here -- do what works for you, what makes you most mentally and physically comfortable -- it just takes the opposite form.
Last week, as I walked my dog around the block in my PJ's, I found myself justifying this absurd decision by telling myself, "In urban areas, your neighborhood is really an extension of your living room..."
Um, since when?!? Ridiculous.
Today, at least I pulled on jeans before heading out the door. Baby steps :)
Love this post. . .I am in my pjs right now, at 1:09 pm. I did get showered but I put them back on! I am happiest in pjs, followed by sweats/loose pants/comfy shorts. My family thinks I'm really weird. And my kids are bussed to school, and they are old enough to catch those busses on their own, so it is quite easy for me to sit in my pjs all day until I have to drive them to after school acitivities.
What a timely post! A few weeks ago, I bought new teal eyeliner, hoping the sheer fun of using it would inspire me to wear makeup a bit more regularly. It's mostly working. Now, if I could only take a curling iron to my hair every once in a while...
I draw the line at wearing PJs all day, though! I live a block from our elementary school, and long ago, I vowed to NOT be the mother walking her kid to school in slippers. Which doesn't stop me from dropping her off in sweats.
Thank goodness I'm not the only one! I thought it was just because I lived abroad and often want to escape the German-speaking world that I become a writing hermit and don't take a shower until after my afternoon workout. Good to know this is common everywhere!
When I am in serious writer mode, I find it really hard to muster the energy to appear human. I sit, legs crossed, in sweat, with a liter of diet coke and a bag of sun chips and a computer. Ugh. Typing that I just realized how ridiculous it sounds, perhaps why my husband walked in late Friday night and asked me if I was on crack. On those days though, I just make ti a point to take a quick walk around the block. My neighborhood's small enough that I want to look at least somewhat human so I make myself at least look in the mirror. And just getting a little sun makes me feel less like a hermit.
These days cute workout clothes are as presentable as a nice outfit, so I think you should feel good about your choice. Makeup is extremely admirable.
Fun post! Lots of good comments. I'd say, if it feels right, then for you, it's right. When you're deep into an ms, it matters more than you feel "right" (good, productive, whatever). Sometimes, the biggest goal is to just not be a total dirt bag, not for other's judgments, but because it impedes rational thought. Lol. Thanks for the post.
I have to have a shower, make up, and clean clothes.
Voila! The rest is just winging it. But I have to have the face on.
Is it a guy thing? I don't need extra incentive to get dressed in the morning before getting to work.
One tip I've heard is to put your shoes on to get yourself in gear, but I confess I often work barefoot. And sometimes out on my patio. Other times I remind myself of the presence of the rest of the world by walking a mile to the nearest coffeeshop and working there on my trusty netbook.
I usually stay in my pjs until noon, take a shower, and throw on a pair of jeans before I go to the office for a couple hours for the magazine I write for. When I don't go to the office, I either skip the shower and just wear sweats. But since the weather has improved and I want to train for a 10K it's sweats, shower, and then jeans. I stopped wearing make up when I went freelance, but I religiously apply moisturizer with a high SPF.
I cannot function unless I shower and put on make-up in the morning. And I workout at noon most days, so I have to repeat the whole routine again in the afternoon (I know ... not super efficient). Anyway, my point is -- tinted moisturizer is a lifesaver for me. It goes on fast and easy, and adds polish without my having to go through the whole foundation/powder routine. Then, some mascara, blush and lip gloss and I'd done.
Yes! I was self-employed over 8 years and the last 2 I barely needed to go into an office. When I started working staff again, I was thinking... hmmm.... I have maybe 3 work appropriate items in my closet that are super uncomfortable.
I invested in some extremely comfortable, stylish pumps from Aerosoles that I love! I get so many compliments. I also bought a series of comfortable, nearly iron-free dresses from The Loft and a handful of stores that I felt professional and comfy in. At times it made me break out into a sweat to invest in a wardrobe, but now even on weekends I enjoy my comfy 'work clothes' and cute dresses to my stiff jeans and T-shirts.
I've also found I feel more productive than in my robe and bare feet, which is what I use to work in. It wasn't pretty! I would force myself into sweats just before my husband got home.
Well, I write this comment from IN BED with my PJs still on...so obviously I have no advice. ;)
I'm with you. There's something to be said for being comfortable when you write - with no waist band digging into the skin or high heels rubbing the feet. And, oddly, a little makeup has the weird effect of making me feel smarter (and ready to go out to dinner if the occasion arises). In the 1950s, women wore pumps and little foofy dresses with ruffles to cook and clean house. I'm SO glad this is not the fifties.
Hey guys! Thanks for all weighing in! I totally apologize - I meant to reply to so many of you individually but my 3 yo fell and broke her arm on Monday, which took me out of the office (and way behind yesterday) all day, and thus, I was delinquent. :) But I'm trying to be better about jumping in and participating, so please know that I'm reading the comments and LOVING them, and in this case - with this entry - am taking comfort that there's safety in numbers (of us wearing our sweats!).
Ha! When I lived in Mexico putting on makeup was always a sign it was big day. :) It's amazing how much more human you feel when you take two seconds to make an effort.
No, I haven't put on makeup today.
I work from home, so it's sweats every day for me too - I usually shower first thing in the morning and then wear them all day. My thing to feel less slovenly is making sure my hair is done. Not that it takes much extra effort, as my hair is low maintenance, but just making sure it's neat and looks presentable!