So shortly after I banged out last week's post about my gestation period, I had it - that lightbulb moment when I just new that I had THE BIG IDEA! Is there anything better? Is there anything more terrifying? Yes and no all at once.

My agent happened to call me that morning, so I put it out there for her - she loved it. I banged out a synopsis and sent it along. She loved it even more. I sent it to my husband, who by the by, is not the great giver of overly-euphusive compliments, and he deemed it "tremendous." Woohee!

With that, I was off. I sat down that very afternoon and wrote the first chapter. I sat down the next afternoon and wrote the next. And now I'm sort of flying - very much like when I wrote Time of My Life and very, very different than when I wrote The One That I Want. That pressure to perform is off, and I'm remembering WHY I love TELLING stories. Isn't that why we do this, after all? NOT because of book sales or huge advances or fabulous reviews (though all of those are very, very lovely), but because somewhere inside of us, we have stories to tell. And thank goodness I'm remembering that I still have the passion to do that.

Of course, now, I have the mountain to climb, and this is where I have mixed emotions about starting a new book. The beginning is my least favorite part, I'll be honest. I'm standing at the base of Mt. Everest, looking up, thinking, "Oh my god, I know I can do this, but god help me, can I really???" I feel this way at the start of EVERY book I've ever written, and it's not until I get a good 10-20k words in that I feel more sure of myself, not because I doubt that I can't write it - if The One That I Want, which was more labor than love, proved - I CAN push that boulder up the mountain - it's just the heft of having to do so. That's the funny thing about being an author - once you reach the top of the mountain, you have no choice to come down and start ascending again. Up and down we go. It's like we're masochists or something.

But I'm enjoying this masochism for now. I'm thinking about my characters all the time, sinking into them, marinating them, the ways I can manipulate them, make their stories ones that have to be told. It's a pretty joyful moment, even with the mix of dread. I'll keep you posted as I go.